MORE ON GAY MARRIAGE

Wow…say something about people from the LGBT being able to get married and you would think the world was ending tomorrow…say something about feeding the hungry and no one says a word. Well since I have been asked about “gay marriage” hundreds of times, here is a written interview concerning the subject. Hopefully my last comments on the subject since there is no possible way to deny us loving our partners except by making it against the law. Folks tried that and it didn’t work, we still found the love of our life. By law you can deny us our rights to the basic things that every married couple enjoys but we will still find the one to love with the very depths of our soul. So we are not going away anytime soon, unless of course straight people stop having babies.

1. What is your personal opinion of same-sex marriage?

Marriage is a covenant between two people, God and their community. The genders of the couple does not matter. Over the last several years the debate concerning “gay marriage” has risen to new heights of passion, bigotry and nastiness. I suspect the basic reason for this is centered around power and control issues. Those who have defined marriage as the exclusive right of heterosexuals have lost all the other power and control battles: women’s right to choose, women’s right to work for equal pay, women get to vote, all races get to vote, mixed races can have marriage, segregation of the races is no longer legal, etc. etc. I would also suspect they are probably not very secure in their own sexual orientation, otherwise why would LGBT people being married effect them? So this whole gay marriage thing gets very personal for them.

Marriage up until very recently was less about two people who love each other deeply and are committed to living in a way that will enhance that love. Rather, it was about tax breaks, exemptions, property and legitimate (read: legal) sex. In fact it was not till the late 20th century the whole marriage for love thing came about anyway, prior to this the really huge reason for getting married was property and inheritance. My goodness for centuries marriages were arranged by the family with no thought at all about love. I wonder which scenario God is more concerned about?

Further as I have said before, we live in a world where marriage vows are usually not worth the paper on which they are written. Suddenly now they mean something because gay folks want recognition of their love? Yet the idea of a covenant is the total investment of those involved. I wonder if God is more concerned about promises and covenants that call on people to go deeper in their relationship than simple dogma and church rules and an institution which has been terrible hypocritical over the centuries.

2. Does the Bible really say that homosexual marriage shouldn’t be possible?

No, because the people of biblical times did not understand homosexuality the way we do, just as I am sure people of biblical times would have thought flying in an airplane or going to the moon was sinister and evil. God gave us free will and the ability to learn. I would hope we have learned a few things in a few thousand years.

3. Should the definition of marriage be based on the Bible, if there is a definite definition?

I gave my definition of marriage under the first question. Furthermore, I will ask again what was the greatest commandment? Love God your God with all your heart, soul and strength and the second is like it, love your neighbor as yourself. This seems to me to be far more important then worrying about the gender identity of people who want a committed God-filled relationship.

4. How do you feel about homosexuals parenting children?

No different than I feel about straight people parenting children. In fact just check the records and any Department of Children Services anywhere in the United States and one will find that LGBT folks being parents are not the problem. Instead it is a rather shocking number of straight people who have no business ever being near a child let alone parenting children. Throughout history the unspeakable horrors that have been done to children have been done by straight folks not LGBT folks. And before anyone goes where they don’t belong, pedophilia has no sexual orientation. Further the overwhelming majority of pedophiles are straight.

5. Do you feel that homosexual males and lesbians are capable of parenting?

Of course, and there are many who are doing just that. I have a male couple in my church who are raising three children and the kids are just fine. We have a lesbian couple who have given birth to a child and another lesbian couple who have 6 kids between them and all those children are healthy, happy and secure in their families.

6. What do you think of a possible 28th Amendment to permanently restrict homosexuals from getting married?

What will happen to bisexuals or transsexuals? Does this mean anyone who has ever had same-gender sex are banned from getting married? It is a stupid, ill conceived, hateful and a degrading exclusionary amendment.

7. What do you think of those who are strictly against homosexuality and any rights they are fighting for?

They are misguided and probably are not secure in their own gender identity and sexual practices. The question should be: How does recognizing the basic civil rights of every adult in the country affect your identity? My partner and I have been in a committed, married relationship for 25 years. How has that hurt anyone else?

Enough said for now.

Rev. Paul M. Turner

About Rev. Paul M. Turner

Founding and Senior Pastor of Gentle Spirit Christian Church, Rev. Paul M. Turner grew up in suburban Chicago and was ordained by the Universal Fellowship of Metropolitan Community Churches in 1989. He and his husband Bill have lived in metro Atlanta since 1994. He is the editor of the Seeds of Hope blog whose posts from 1999-2005 are at http://whosoever.org/seeds/ -- and which now resides at https://gentlespirit.org/topics/blog/seeds-of-hope/.

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